Sunday, April 09, 2006

Return of the Red-Eyed Toyol

Star photo
He’s back. You know, our Jinn in a Nescafé Bottle!

Poor frightened mechanic Wan Kamal Wan Muda, while playing beach volleyball at Kampong Merchang in Trengganu
came across the dreaded bottle containing the red-eyed figurine clad in black. He immediately recalled that such an item containing a suspected toyol (Malaysian goblin or imp) was thrown into the sea recently by some fairly shaken up blokes at Kuantan.

He showed it to his father who told him that it belonged to cultures that worship the figurine. Hmmm, what cultures?

Anway, the people in his villager was so terrified by the arrival of the toyol, which they reckoned was a bad omen, that they seized it from Wan Kamal and threw it back again into the sea.

Just as a refresher as to what a toyol is, it’s a SE Asian supernatural creature brought to life from a dead/aborted baby foetus by occult means. The owner, its creator or purchaser - & it's possible to purchase a toyol from a witch doctor - maintains the creature's allegiance by feeding it with his/her own blood, just a few drops taken from a pricked finger or toe.

The toyol can be used to conduct spying, stealing, spooking (harassing) or gambling missions
 (forecasting wins) for the owner.

But some say that a person who keeps such a creature of the Dark would be stuck with the toyol for life, a kind of damnation. Before the owner's own demise, it's vital that he or she pass the creature to a new owner to maintain regular feeding.

If the handover is not successfully completed before the owner croaks, the toyol will turn against the owner to feed on him/her. Apparently being eaten up by a toyol on one's death bed is not a pretty sight or pleasant at all, and excruciatingly painful for the dying owner. The dying would take a very very long and agonizing time.

OK, here's what's happening next! We are going to get the hot couple, Dian, a young, sexy and beautiful archaeology lecturer, and handsome Police ASP Norman, who had been investigating the Orang Minyak (serial rapist Oily Man) to look into this! Visualize their hot investigation into the case of the Re-appearing Black Red-eyed Toyol.

Norman: “Dian, I’m closing the case of the Orang Minyak. I don’t think we’ll hear from him again.”

Dian (smirking):
“Yeah, I am not surprised. I heard your Police couldn’t find their own noses even if those were in front of them.”
Norman: “Oh? Why do you say that?”
Dian: “I read this rather interesting blog with the posting Brutal murderers among us!”.

Norman thought: that KTemoc bastard – I’ll get him.“C’mon Dian, sometimes evidence were corrupted by civilians on the scene and we police gets the blame. Anyway, the oil price is too high for the Orang Minyak to play around extravagantly with grease. If there’s any silver lining in the fuel price hike, it’s that it has financially curbed that serial rapist. And don't read that KTemoc postings - he's a ... eh ... trouble maker.”
Dian: “Oh, I like KTemoc - from his writing I think he's kind of sensitive and imagine he must be rather cute. Anyway, what about the price of chemicals?”

Norman: “Cute? I'll cute him! Chemicals? OK, let's stay on this chemical thingy - what chemicals are we talking about?”
“You know, the chemicals your FRU used to lace their water cannons.”

Norman (exaggerating a pained look): “Dian, Dian Dian! Let's be fair lah! We’re required by law to maintain public order. I know we look bad, but those protestors weren’t your average concerned ordinary civilians who were outraged by the increased fuel price. They were PKR and PAS members out to exploit the situation for cheap publicity."

"Everyone knows PKR’s popularity has been flagging off badly; it's in dire need of a dramatic boost in publicity. That’s why their members, those remaining anyway, were out in full force. One PAS leader even took along his 6-year old daughter. Can you imagine the irresponsibility of that?"

"It’s obvious PKR and PAS were out for political gains rather than protesting against the fuel price. Did you see any DAP members there?”

Dian (switching subject to avoid arguing): “I heard the toyol’s back!”

Norman (relieved of the change in topics):
“Yes, what does your archaeological background tell you about such things?”
Dian: “It’s obvious the sea current brought the floating bottle to Kampong Merchang. But if you’re asking about its occult aspect, we could go all the way back to the Greek mythical Hecate, or even earlier to the ancient Egyptian Isis, or Hinduism's Tantric branch."

"The last had been the strongest influence on Javanese and Balinese Hinduism and thus their occultism. Hinduism had also influenced Khmer, Thai and Burmese black magic. We live right on the cross roads of these ancient civilisations hence the Malaysian origin of the occult may be traced back to Tantric Hinduism as well. Even Lamaism practises some form of high level Tantric Buddhism, which merges Tantric Hinduism and Buddhism, something entirely unique to Tibet.”
Norman (smirking): "Well, I’ve heard about Tantric sex and the Kama Sutra.”
Dian: “Huh, I am not surprised!”
Norman (exploiting what he saw as an opening): "Hey, what say we go out tonight and get to know each other better?”
Dian (with Mona Lisa smile): “No can do, Haven’t you heard what federal court judge Ahmad Fairuz Sheikh Abdul Halim pronounced recently?"

Norman (protesting) “But but but that’s to do with kissing and hugging! swallowing up Dian’s bait.

Dian (closing the trap): “I rest my case, your honour.”

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