Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Day's wild sex romps & orgies

Malaysiakini's Valentine's Day raid nabs five couples in Selangor reported:

Five couples were picked up by the Selangor Islamic Affairs Department (Jais) and the Petaling Jaya City Council (MBPJ) in an early morning anti-vice raid that was apparently timed to coincide with Valentine’s Day today. [...]

The operation dubbed ‘Petaling district level 6th anti-vice campaign’, saw the participation of 85 enforcement officers from Jais, MBPJ, the Immigration Department, district land office and police.

Vice? I assume it would be vice only under syariah laws, because if (non-Muslim) Chinese or Indian adult couples were/are engaged in a wee bit of covert nookie, it won’t be 'vice' at all, and those Jais blokes would have been told to mind their own bloody business with a “f* off (or go & jerk off), you pervs”.

Incidentally, why were officers from the district land office involved? Came for the show a la Zouk nightclub?

But sad as it had been for those 5 Muslim couples to be caught with their pants down (literally), we must all congratulate Jais for its brilliant success, and treat it as great news, because this means that from tomorrow, 15 Feb 2012 until next year, 13 Feb 2013, there won’t be any Malaysian Muslims indulging in such Valentine's Day immoral activities, the types that PAS Youth had claimed would happened on 14 Feb each year.

Thank goodness that from now, only normal Malaysian sex crimes like incest, rape, sodomy and oral sex will happen, at least until 13 Feb 2013.

I personally don’t care much about Valentine’s Day; in fact I hate it because I associate it as a day of being made to feel bad/guilty - when I had sweethearts, I was regularly in the dog house for forgetting my boyfriend’s duties, namely providing sweeties with that damn bunch of roses. F* Valentine’s Day.

Despite its religious sounding name, Valentine’s Day is not a public holiday at all, no, not anywhere, not even in the Roman Catholic World. In fact, in 1969 His Holiness Pope Paul VI wiped out Valentine’s Day from the General RC calendar of saints’ days. Praise His Holy Daddy!

And with that, boyfriends around the world heaved a great sigh of relief until those blasted florists and chocolatiers revive its celebrations, naturally for their commercial interests, as they did by inventing Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. Soon, if they have their evil ways, every day will be ‘something’ Day.

But notwithstanding all these known commercial interests, somehow, there are some Malaysians, presumably those whose heads are constantly filled with visions of wild sex romps and orgies, who believe that on Valentine’s Day our hormones will somehow exponentially increase to an extent that we would scare even the wildest satyrs and nymphs.

Either those fantasizing Malaysians don’t have a f* clue what the modern commercialized Valentine’s Day celebrations is about, or they do but prefer to act dunno and exploit the day kau kau so as to exercise their 'Lil Napoleon-ic authority through warnings, scaring, threats and terrorizing (via peeping tom raids) to consolidate their hold on their followers.

But I propose that we do away with Valentine's Day (and neutralise the PAS-DAP squabbling) by substituting it with a Malaysian equivalent, Chap Goh Meh Night, all complete with Dondang Sayang pantuns and singing wakakaka - for more, see my post Chap Goh Meh in Penang.

Florists and chocolatiers needn't worry about reduced sales, au contraire, with my proposed substitution of festivities because they can continue to peddle their wares on Chap Goh Meh, the Malaysian Day of Sweet Love, which will then be celebrated by all Malaysians and not only Chinese, truly 1Malaysia.

Additionally, sales of mandarin oranges will increase as some will be bought to throw not just at the sea but also (peeping tom) 'pervs' wakakaka. We could also introduce the throwing of pisang raja's for men as a yang to the yin of women's oranges. Goodness, sales of our agricultural products will go right through the roof.


  1. My young wife bought me a present for Valentine Day...and if I forget to give her one...she will think I love her less....and no cooking...no nothing...and it will become a hell day....for me.
    Yes...I hate Valentine Day too...and so are the many ONE day ..you must remember this or that..as if throughout the whole year..you can forget your parents..except Father or Mother's Day.
    What bloody nonsense is that.
    And the whole post..it is humorous and soon police will knock at KT's door for insulting Muslims know only how to fuck on Valentine Day.

  2. Was it Ball and Bruno who were caught in the morning lovefest?. Must be, since they are both jobless.
    Happy Valentine's Day you all.

  3. Buttercup's cup runneth over...loose HER bearings...still talking nonsense to a grandfather...with a joke she thinks is a joke..but the joke is on her.
    She does not know jobless and retiring from working.
    No wonder she counts millions for the government and think she is a millionaire....then next day...admit she must work for her bread and butter.
    Such is the typical product of our Malaysian education system....producing idiots to depend on hand outs like beggars...for the rest of their miserable lives.
    dey-O..Buttercup....I got a MONEY TREE. Do you have one?
    Don't have...shout for it to Najib.
    Dare not...shut the fuck up!!

  4. One must give credit..when credit is due....and that is KTemoc...can put out a post with lively colorful designs...and humorous message.
    Night owls...creepers and jeepers are out.
    I take leave and hand over to Bruno...and others to enjoy.
    Valentine Day to a grandfather like me...is no special day...except to say hope and avoid drunkards driving like mad cows.

  5. Wild sex romp and orgies for pondans with sex toys will have Buttercup,Butterplate and tokio_rain in front of the line.Have fun,lovelies and happy valentine's day.

  6. Is the lady in the picture(orang putih) buttercup's twin butterplate,or vice versa.hehehe.

  7. breaking news! a 78-year-old-man calling himself monsterball was arrested early valentine morning by police for misbehaving in public. he will be charged for trying a threesome in his car, with 2 inflatable dolls.


  8. breaking news!a 16 year old boy calling himself tokio rain with 2 real life boyfriends buttercup and butterplate was arrested acting up naked in a public park.They were charged involved in a threesome.

  9. Wasn't it going to be called "Couples Day"? Or was that just a proposal from a PAS member to avoid having o do anythign with a "Christian" day?

    I wonder if "Couples Day" was to be for coupling couples (with their "sijil perkhawinan" in hand, of course)? Malaysian is "Truly Wonderful".

  10. A 16 year old boy and his two boyfriends,hehehe.Wait till monsterball see the news.Tokio rain,buttercup and butterplate are triplets.

  11. Good Morning Bruno and friends.
    Thanks Anon 2.53am.
    The triplets...you play me...I play you... naked in a park??

  12. Tis the morning of the next day...and the triplets spent a night in jail....a mild godly punishment....they deserve for disturbing an old man.
    Tokio -rain must have seen a ghost..look like me..sound like me...but it is not me...for he is a much older man....looking like me.
    Tokio-rain..they say when you can see a ghost...you can kiss goodbye to Buttercup and Butterplate...you days are numbered ..just like Najib and Rosmah.

  13. REMINDER!!!
    Debate ...Lim Guan Eng Vs Chua Soi Lek...this Saturday...LIVE on TV.
    It's a Street Fighter Vs Hound-Dog.
    It's elected Penang CM Vs a Back-Door puppet.
    It's Handsome Vs Ugly
    It's Smart Vs Stupid
    One look at both faces...you can already know...who will win.

  14. Monsterball,good morning.Now we have triplets.Soon we will be having quartets.Today will be a good day as the triplets are still in lockup.No one else to bother us for the rest of the day.Relax and have a nice day.

  15. Thanks...same to you and to all my friends.
    Tokio-rain shame his UMNO masters..day in day out.
    It is a characteristic...very hard to change..for Mahathir has planted into their minds...for 22 years...they are the owners of Malaysia and we all others tenants.
    No need to teach manners....morals...ethics ..principles in life.
    After all....they are children of billionaires....and money face is more important than anything else in the world.
    Arab Spring is coming to sweep away hypocrites...thieves and rouges...spoiling the Islamic religion.
    Right now...a Malaysian by the name of Mat Sabu said..
    "Anything But UMNO"..and the ABU slogan was born...preparing for Arab Spring to come to Malaysia...and help chase their own devilish kind away.
    Meanwhile....I sincerely hope KTemoc get used to the ideas that Anwar Ibrahim will be PM.
    You need to meet Anwar and shake his hand and feel that extra ordinary ...inner strength he has.
    Any other Malaysian would have given up ..go in exile and live a comfortable life....but not Anwar...who love the country and people more than his own life.
    Even Lim Kit Siang treats him like a younger brother...and Karpal treats him like a son..while Nik Aziz keep praying for his health and safe keeping.
    KTemoc...should not use Anwar's past position as an UMNO man and judge him that way..or keep making fun at him.
    If KTemoc has any love for country and people more than himself...feeling the pains and sufferings of the poor and needy...feeling the billions stolen are partly from these poor people too....he will not make fun of Anwar Ibrahim at all.

  16. It's strange that KTemoc respect Valentine Day...a day of true love for young and old couples.
    LOVE is a word that can be so pure...yet so dirty...depending who is professing it.
    Just a short one...Mahathir love to divide and rule.
    Mahathir love to steal money...and teach all to do the same thing.
    Anwar love the country and people more than his life.
    And so...the word LOVE....branches off to thousands of sensational touches and feelings.
    How many can KTemoc identify himself having true love..for others?
    The only good sign I see is that KT does appreciate good advises.

  17. It's a monsterballl...rolling to knock down all ten pins...striking and striking.
    It's a monster bowling ball!!
    Do you know scientific blowing....how to use you arm...thumb...legs timing...curve ball hole or half curve or straight roll..from holes drilled??
    13th GE is near...MONSTERBALL is revealed....a bowling Ball that roll, like a monster..strikes after strikes.
    So when one wants ...make sure he/she can score like me...for "Monsterball" also mean.......??????hahgahahahahaha