Char koay teow, Malay style

Once I penned a char koay teow story about my friend Tan Ah Kow who was a real char koay teow hawker - for more, read my KTemoc Kongsamkok post titled The 'rich' char koay teow boy.

But the above is about genuine though haram char koay teow, which uses a "particular type" of lard and also some laap-cheong (sausages), the sort Muslims don't want to even think about, let alone eat.

In this post I want to narrate a char koay teow story but without the haram stuff as I have in mind a Malay-style char koay teow - note it's Malay-style and not Malaysian-style.

The dietary consideration is that it is devoid of the haram ingredients Chinese love, but you my dear readers especially Muslims have to assess and decide whether it's halal even though I suggest it's non-haram, because non-haram doesn't automatically confer a halal label on the food, wakakaka.

The word 'char' in char koay teow is 'stir fry' or 'goreng'. And in a char koay teow scenario the goreng-ing is usually done with chilli paste, pepper and in a wok that's burning hot, known in Canto as 'wok-hei' (breath of the wok) where the product of the goreng-ing will ensure the food being served still retains the heat (or breath) of the super-hot wok for several long minutes after being served.

Believe, in such a hot combination it's not comfy if you happen to to be the koay teow (rice noodles strips or sticks), and you can take it the goreng-er indeed wants the koay teow to feel the heat, wakakaka.

The char koay teow I have in mind is not a genuine dish but a political char koay teow, Malay style, wakakaka, a type which I had already mentioned to in a previous post titled National hero?, where I wrote:

Has Dr M been right to char koay teow on the Altantuyaa case, by calling on Najib NOW to answer allegedly unanswered questions on the murder of the Mongolian model, or ...

... to declare he is willing to meet up with the mum of convicted murderer Sirul, ...

... and the last in my opinion, just plain silly and scraping the bottom of the barrel, ...

... to state the convicted killer (Sirul) did not murder anyone when he was Dr M's bodyguard - an assertion which has been nothing more than just a silly provocation with no connection whatsoever to what Sirul might have done and did subsequently to serving Dr M.

Wakakaka!

Take the current situation where Dr Mahathir is snapping at Najib's heel to make the latter 'come clean' on the Altantuyaa murder, regardless of Najib's involvement, and where Mahfuz Omar of PAS has already arranged for Sirul Azhar Umar's mum to meet up with Dr M, and is now arranging for a phone link-up between Sirul ad Dr M.

What we have starring in this char koay teow tale or comedy of nonsense is:

(a) a (so-called) retired politician presented to us (admittedly not by Dr M himself) as if he is a current Malaysian Criminal Special Investigator (CSI). To be fair to him he has urged police to investigate further,

(b) a convicted killer who is highly valued by some sides of politics and thus shouldn't be executed as per the death sentence the court has handed down to him, apparently because he allegedly has only followed instructions but which even that, for some unexplained reason makes him somehow guiltless of murder. To be fair to Sirul he expresses his disappointment with politicians EXPLOITING his mum for political reasons,

(c) a mum who like my late mum would swear her son is the nicest bloke in town, and that the son if naughty was only following instructions,

(d) a PAS politician who went all the way to Australia with Sirul's mum BUT came back empty handed, but who now switches to his political life line called Dr Mahathir, currently an anti Najib proponent. What next? Call on PAS fave line, that of "divine wrath", perhaps manifested as another flood or another tsunami?

Somewhere, somehow, sometime (in the immediate future), there is high expectation by many Pakatan followers (I'm definitely not one of them, god forbid, excuse the pun, wakakaka) that the above CSI team will reveal the "real" (as in their hopes) murderer of Altantuyaa Shaariibuu, preferably Najib. If not Najib, then another further investigation should be called for.

And their main investigative line is beautifully simple (or rather, simplistic), to harass Najib into self-confession or at least, to make him lose his position as head of UMNO and thus PM of Malaysia.

That, my dear readers, is the real objective, and not justice for Altantuyaa. Surely you were not dreaming?

Anyway, where is the evidence of Najib ever knowing Altantuyaa, minus of course the amazing photoshop skills of Tian Chua or the relentless G.A.N insinuations by PKR originally and now PAS, or the SD that RPK lodged but which contents, according to RPK, came from some former staff of Ku Li?

In a Malaysiakini article, it was reported that:

Raja Petra had previously blogged that he was introduced to Lt Kol Azmi Zainal Abidin - who he described as being the "number two in the special branch of the military intelligence" - who was the source of the accusation against Rosmah.

The people Raja Petra said introduced him to Azmi, furthermore, were Nik Azmi Nik Daud and John Pang, both of whom had worked for Umno stalwart Tengku Razaleigh Hamzah, and blogger Din Merican who was once close to Anwar.

In the interview with Ashraf, Raja Petra said he does not accept any longer the storyline pushed by the trio.

Was Altantuyaa harassing Najib when she was alive and in KL? If not, why not? Speak up and don't be stupefied into dumbness!

Why hasn't Dr Mahathir raise the Altnatuyaa issue much earlier, in fact from Day 1? Why only now when he is known to be at venomous odds with Najib?

Najib revealed that in his tete-a-tete with Dr Mahathir, one of two things Dr Mahathir wanted him to do was to revive the “crooked bridge” project linking Johor and Singapore, thus confirming our suspicion on why he undermined AAB to such an extent that UMNO suffered collateral damage in 2008, and from which the party never quite recovered.

The 'crooked bridge' was, we suspected, to spite Sing!

In any case, it can be argued that it has been Dr Mahathir who made UMNO lost its 2/3 in 2008, and not AAB. AAB was the hapless victim.

Dr M has recently said that Najib will lose the next election for UMNO but on the logic of this post's discussion we can argue that if UMNO were to lose in GE-14, it would be Dr Mahathir who loses it for his party by continuously undermining Najib and thus indirectly UMNO.

The other probable sin of Najib in Dr M's eyes, as we can speculate, would be Najib's cooperation with the Sing government in the development of KTM land in Singapore. If Dr M was Yama, I speculate he would have consigned Najib to the 18th Hell for eternity for the most blasphemous sin of cooperating with Sing, wakakaka.

looes74 being rebus-ed kau kau in hell

oh, he's the one with the wee-est weenie

wakakaka

Hasn't it been bad enough of Najib for refusing to revive Dr M's 'crooked bridge' but to also now cooperate with Sing on developing a sweet piece of real estate in Sing owned by KTM?

Okay, so has the char koay teow-ing by Dr Mahathir and PAS' Mahfuz Omar been halal? You tell me!

Of course those of us who'd blindly support an attack, no doubt on a political enemy, but without any real evidence, are just as guilty as those people who char koay teow for their own vile political agenda. 

I too want BN-UMNO to lose and despite silly accusations by some of my readers, don't support Najib (which Chinese Malaysian would of a man who wanted to bath his keris with Chinese blood) but how about some intelligent thinking, fairness and self integrity, and non-moronic blind sickening Bush-ism for a change?

Let us have some real evidence, not just prejudiced moronic wishful thinking! Possible? But I won't hold my breath, wakakaka.