Saturday, August 06, 2011


..... ring ring ring ring ring .....

X: Hello hello?

Y: Yes, who’s that on my private line?

X: Oh my dear PM, it’s just me Bernie.

Y: Your Holiness! How nice of you to call me.

X: Just call me Bernie, frankly my friend, that ‘Your Holiness’ business is getting a bit on me. It reminds me of another ‘Holiness’, you know, that one in yello ... ooops I mean ... saffron robes.

Y: Hahaha, that incredibly idolised insurgent whom the Chinese government loves to hate or hates to love.

X: Yes yes hehehe, very clever play of words hahaha.

Y: [loud glum sigh] Bernie, I’m afraid I am not that well appreciated at home.

X: Don’t despair my dear friend, as they say, a prophet is never well received at home. Look at Prophet Mohamed peace be upon his name and his flight from his hometown of Mecca.

Y: Yes, you right, also look at Nabi Isa peace be upon his name and his persecution at the hands of his own people in Jerusalem.

X [slightly taut voice]: May I correct you my dear friend, Jesus was not a mere prophet but the son of God.

Y: Well, at least, not the son of Allah swt.

X: Hahaha, very droll very droll. Anyway, I rang because of some recent controversy at a church organized dinner. Should my fellow Catholics there be concerned?

Y: Not at this stage Bernie, it’s the other church which had been involved, hahaha. But if the Chinese authority thinks your Buddhist counterpart is a traitorous insurgent, they should see what I have here in my own party.

X: Be brave my friend, for was not Jesus himself betrayed for 30 pieces of silver?

Y: My versions of Judas demand more than 30 pieces, more like 30 billion. That illegal and arrogant raid has been one in a series of sabotaging acts to embarrass me and undermine my leadership. I expect more to come.

X: Oh dear, will our recent breaking bread together at my enclave in the Eternal City be used against you?

Y: That possibility, nay, make that ‘probability’ instead, certainly exists. By the by, is there any villa located in a secluded suburb in your area available for long term lease?

X: My dear friend, is the Pope a Catholic?

Y: Hahaha, thank you thank you, you’re a cool dude ... er ... I mean ... dad ... er father ... er ... papa, you know what I mean.

X: Bless you my friend, in nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti, go in peace.

Y [thinks]: Go in peace? That’s what that bloody teacherous Moodeen Judas wants.


  1. Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God was missing for six days.
    Eventually, the archangel Michael found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look, Michael, look what I've made." Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

    "It's a planet," replied God," and I've put Life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."

    "Balance?", inquired Michael, still confused.

    God explained, pointing to different parts of earth; "For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people". God continued, pointing to different countries; "This one will be extremely hot and arid, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

    The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a small land mass and said, "What's that place called?"

    "Ah," said God. "That's Canland, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful, green fields, sunsets, and rolling hills. The people from Canland are going to be modest, intelligent, and humorous, and extremely sociable, hardworking, and high-achieving, and they will be known throughout the world."

    Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there would be balance!"

    God replied wisely, "Wait until you see the idiots I'm putting to rule them in Putrajaya."

  2. Well,my dear friend,says the man dressed in yellow safron robes.When the French courts start on the scorpene case,where will you be.The answer.I will be living in luxury in one of the caves in the mountains of the Himalayas,says Jibby.The man in yellow replied.You called that a luxury.Jibby nodded his head.Thats a luxury compared to Hotel Kamunting or being exiled to Zimbabwe.

  3. From The Star yesterday:

    "... Earlier in a press conference at Komtar, Tahir said contracts awarded to Class F contractors by the state were done through the open tender process.

    He claimed contractors need to go through Umno division heads when Barisan ruled Penang, alleging that sometimes they need to contribute RM5,000 or RM6,000 to get the projects.

    “I have also fallen victim to such process,” he claimed..."

  4. Y [thinks]: Go in peace? That’s what that bloody teacherous Moodeen Judas wants.

    So, kaytee, what you're saying in effect is that while Jeeb is trying to perform a complicated dance on stage Moodeen is hiding behind the curtains and, with a wicked grin on his face, pushing out marbles onto the dance floor with the hope that Jeeb will step on one, lose his balance, and fall down flat on his face in front of the the vast audience.

    Now, let me visualize this scene in my mind's eye and ... omigosh ... hahahahaha! that's absolutely hilarious!

  5. Jeeb might take to wearing a long and scraggly beard to attract votes

  6. Nice piece. I call this a serious issue comedy. But nothing is forever, the cane used to cane a 'foolish man' may one day be used on a 'wise man'