Thursday, July 20, 2006

Parliament's Hantu - Ghost Buster Rejected!

Ring ring ring … ring iiiiing iiiiing

Aide: Hello, Pejabat PM

Voice: May I speak to the Law Minister please?

Aide: Who’s speaking?

Voice: Jaan-Tan*

* Jaan-Tan sounds like the Malay word jantan (male or one having balls)

Silence ……….. for 20 seconds

Aide (annoyed): You funny?

Voice: No, not Farnee … Jaan-Tan.

Aide (angry but still trying to be polite and cool): Look, Incik, this is the PM’s department, so don’t fool around. I advise you to put the phone down.

Voice (very insistent): I want to speak to the Law Minister.

Aide (slightly intimidated by the strong low growling authoritative voice on the other end): Who are you?

Voice (exasperated and in with stressful emphasis): Told you I’m Jaan-Tan!

Aide: Er … why do you want to speak with the Minister?

Voice: It’s about that ghost who distributed the flyers in the Dewan Rakyat. I can help.

Aide (annoyed and now alarmed): Look, the investigation is over. The Minister has already told the media that. So stop bothering him.

Voice (quickly slipping in the nature of his help before the aide slams the phone down): I can help identify or trace the ghost.

Aide (very angry): No, thank you, investigation closed. Good bye and Maju Sukan untuk Negara.

Voice: Di UK?

Aide (confused but curious): Er … apa you cakap?*

* what did you say?

Voice: Maju Sukan untuk Negara di UK?

Aide (losing all cool): Well sir, good morning and f**k you.

Slams phone down ........

Voice (putting rural public phone down and turning to his partner): Well dear, he has slammed the phone down before I could tell him that my acute sense of smell may be of some assistance in tracking down the ghostly culprit.

Betty-Na: Jaan-Tan, Jaan-Tan, my darling, how many times have I told you not to interfere with other people's affairs? You just never learn. Those humans have strange unexplainable manners. They don’t want your help. They don’t want the ghost traced. And you just have to slip in that bit about the sports academy in UK

Jaan-Tan (snarl/grin): Just couldn't resist the last bit. That fool kept such an open goal.

And Bigfoot lumbered back into the Johore jungle with his mate, disappointed he couldn’t lend his expertise to solving the mystery of the hantu in the Dewan Rakyat (Parliament's Lower House), but secretly pleased he was given a clear penalty shot.

Related:
Mohd Nazri: "There's a Ghost in Parliament"

4 comments:

  1. To quote:
    "Maju(lah) Sukan untuk Negara di UK?"

    This line is classical, mate! Can't stop laughing at it! ROTFLOL!!!

    Hey, how about writing a conspiracy theory for us about the actual reason why 'Change your lifestyle' bloke is in London. Secret meeting with TM? And the sudden u-turn Brickendon thingy was to humiliate him? :)

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  2. Bigfoot speaks english? Ha funny,..

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  3. "but secretly pleased he was given a clear penalty shot."

    Almost missed it but that was clearly a commentary from the WC Final when Zizou took the penalty...very naughty.

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  4. jibone - translated by KTemoc ;-)

    mob1900 - sorry can't help you there - KTemoc didn't watch most football games, so what was uttered then would only be known by soccer fans

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