UTM Rulebook - Here’s How Not to Exist Culturally

OPINION | UTM Rulebook - Here’s How Not to Exist Culturally


22 Nov 2025 • 9:00 AM MYT


Fa Abdul
FA ABDUL is a former columnist of Malaysiakini & Free Malaysia Today (FMT)

Photo credit: Free Malaysia Today


Many people seem absolutely jaw-dropped by UTM’s newly revealed culture and arts rules. Confused. Shocked. Speechless. Some are even wondering if they accidentally clicked on a rulebook from 1950. So, in the spirit of clarity, transparency, and good old Malaysian efficiency - here’s a simple list to help everyone understand what UTM really expects from its students.


Remember:


Diversity is welcome at UTM - as long as it all looks, sounds, and moves exactly how the Vice-Chancellor imagines it.


If you’re performing music:


Please ensure it is soft, Malay in rhythm, and preferably emotionally dead. Anything resembling fun, groove, or actual cultural expression may trigger a moral audit or an emergency meeting with your lecturer.


Mixed-gender performances are strictly prohibited.


Men and women on the same stage? Preposterous. The temptation to harmonise, smile, or breathe near each other


could destabilise campus morals and lead to… interaction.


Female performances must be watched by females only.


Because apparently the sight of a woman playing the violin is too erotic for the male species.


Foreign culture is not allowed.


“Foreign” means whatever they decide it means this week. Please check for updates before accidentally clapping in a foreign way.


Your performance must reflect ‘high moral standards.’


These standards are invisible and shifting - and they will not be explained. You will simply know you’ve broken them when someone looks disappointed.



Avoid dancing too happily.


Excessive joy is considered subversive. Even a discreet toe-tap may require a formal moral investigation.


Do not express yourself freely.


UTM encourages creativity, as long as you creatively suppress it entirely.


If your performance idea involves innovation, culture, or actual artistic expression:


Stop. Turn around. Pretend you never had the thought.


Before any event, ask yourself:


“Does this reflect the values of UTM?” If you are even slightly unsure, it’s forbidden. Congratulations, you now understand the policy perfectly.


All external cultural groups require approval from the Vice-Chancellor.


Yes, even if they’re just here to play kompang. You never know which kompang rhythms are secretly foreign.


If anyone asks why these rules exist:


The correct answer is: “Because diversity must be protected… from diversity.”


If you feel confused about what’s allowed:


That’s normal. The policy is also confused.


Please focus on your academic excellence.


Ignore critics claiming academic standards are declining. The university is too busy policing drumbeats to deal with that.


Lastly:


When in doubt, please perform nothing. Say nothing. Exist quietly. At least nothing cannot be morally corrupt.


At the end of the day, UTM just wants to create a wholesome, morally upright environment where nothing foreign, joyful, expressive, mixed-gender, rhythmic, innovative, or remotely fun can accidentally occur. We hope this guide helps you navigate campus life safely - and remember, when in doubt, just stand still, hum quietly, and avoid being cultural.