Gong gong ay gigolo?

Martin and Alan are two nice, fit and handsome young blokes. Naturally they feel somewhat vindicated by their personal ‘assets’ when they were promised lucrative jobs as gigolos by a male escort service company. Yes man, gigolos.

Martin and Alan revealed that last month they answered an advertisement in a Chinese newspaper looking for young and handsome men.

Blast, I didn’t see it but then, would I qualify in the ‘looks’ department – mind you, my mum and favourite aunt think I’m handsome though my sister has frequently told me to stop dreaming of her ever introducing her good looking friends to yours truly. She said cruelly I was too embarrassingly ugly to be introduced as her brother. Aiyah, what the hell does she know. Sisters have such poor taste.

Martin, just a young sprightly 22 said: “When we contacted the company, we were promised a monthly salary of US$10,000 (RM37,000) if we did more than just escorting women”.

my underlining – mama mia!

But as always, when one feels a dream has come true, along came a catch too. He and Alan had to deposit RM 1,000 each to an account belonging to the escort service company. He was informed that the RM 1,000 was a fee to become a member of the company.

Alan, the other wannabe gigolo, who at 28 still believe in stuff like genie from a magic lamp, said the company assured them that, with regards to the duties above (underlined by KTemoc), their clients were all young and wealthy foreigners – probably with looks like J Lo, Lindsay Lohan, and Jennifer Hawkins.

Poor Martin and Alan were then instructed to wait for clients at a five-star hotel in Kuala Lumpur. They had a tummy-sinking feeling when they tried to contact the company but discovered that its handphone number was terminated.

What a wasted effort for Martin who had even prepared seriously for the ‘task’ by working out in a gym to make sure his biceps, triceps and uni-ceps (the main vital muscle) looked good and were strong for the expected J-Lo-ish looking clients.

And for sheer dedication, he even drank lots of essence of chicken. It’s amazing that young blokes like him still drink essence of chicken.

I recall when I was a 17-year old going for an interview with an organization in KL, which required applicants to be physically capable, my mum tucked a bottle of Brand’s essence of chicken quietly in my overnight bag, without telling me. She taught it might invigorate my physical capability (though not in the manner that Martin had in mind)

The damn bottle leaked and what a stink it made. Fortunately it affected only my spare underwear – hmmm, I wonder whether there was a sublime message in that coincidence? But I succeeded in that job interview minus my Brand’s.

Alan was more enthusiastic and pro-active. He confessed he actually walked up to several foreigners and asked them if they were his ‘clients’. He narrowly escaped being slapped by two women, thanks to his agility and physical fitness.

MCA Public Services and Complaints Department head Michael Chong said there were probably many others who were duped but were too embarrassed to come forward. I wonder under what category the MCA has filed these two complaints? Gong gong ay* gigolo?

* 'not smart' is a friendly translation