One Born Every Minute (3)

The Star Online reported that an 18-year-old girl slept with a bogus medium so that he could "transfer powers” that could cure her boyfriend of his sexual problems.

The girl sought the help of the medium after her 20-year-old lover developed erectile dysfunction. The medium convinced the victim that the only way to cure her boyfriend was by "transferring his powers” to her through sex.

OK, at this stage, what do you reckon she did?

As I have said, there’s one born every minute. Yes, she agreed to the medium’s recommendation to “transfer power” to her, which was not done just once but several times too. Meanwhile, boyfriend still couldn’t 'rise to the occasion' so the girl began to suspect that the “transference of power” was dodgy.

She ‘fess up to boyfriend that there was a transmission failure even though the “divine connection” was made.

We get the story from the usual source, the police, after the couple reported the matter. It’s the edited version of course. I imagine the uncensored version would be like the following, assuming they were Chinese:

Girl (embarrassed): Ee beh … eh … beh … (he can’t … eh … can’t)
Medium: beh hna mee (What’s he selling?)

The Hokkien word ‘beh’ can mean either ‘cannot’ or ‘sell’.

Girl (shyly): beh choe wah (can’t do it to me)
Medium: beh chwah? (sell paper?)

‘Choe wah’ (do it to me) pronounced wrongly with the wrong accent can sound like ‘chwah’ (paper)

Girl (exasperated): ee beh gnair lah – ee ae lan t’ooi beh gnair kee lai

(no translation required, and if you can’t understand, tough, you’ve miss the best part)

Medium (the penny dropped): ah, parng sim, wa ae thean t’ooi ae parng chor (oh, dinna ye fret, my heavenly wand can help)

Girl: lu ae thean t’ooi?
Medium: wah ae thean t’ooi see kau-teh-thean haw ae, chai boh? che t'ooi kau lart, ee ae lart parng kuai hor lu, lu pun ae khnee tnee ... eh ... hor lu ae tar-poh-peng-eu ae khnee tnee teng peng arn

I am not going to translate this last part - so now’s the time (and motivation) to get to know a Penangite, preferably a female one, to assist with the translation ;-)

Related:
(1) One Born Every Minute
(2) One Born Every Minute (2)